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Monday, May 08, 2006

Love Puke

We should always have a cynic view of love, there is no such thing as a unhealthy cynic. Love creates cynics. Why should we be entwined with love, so entangled with the warmth? Then the more u get spun together on a common web, the attachment grows: distant makes the heart fonder. Then u find yourself hoping that it will last, till you suddenly see the cliff before you, though not too near, it ain't far either. You dispair and despair. You try to find reasons to look at it logically, you try to avoid the hurt that comes. But is still just does. Love puke.

How could I hate love so much, for I have probably never loved before, i dunno what love is, unless infatuation counts. Or maybe infatuation leads to love, but i never did see it go that way yet.
Well the ideas were from Love puke, a play, we saw on Saturday. Sure reminds me of how i liked acting when i was much younger, the lights, the litle makeup, the crowd, the dressing room, the dinners i had to eat quickly so that i got extra time to remember my lines, and the elaborate costumes.

There was an asian girl that was fantastic, cried on the spot during her soliloquy, later i got to know she's actually from VJ and did TSD. Small world. But i thought the first soliloquy was the best: she starts with a normal tone, then goes up and down and stays there and let it simmer in the pain. (like evaporation and rain: Water goes up, the rain falls onto the ground with such pain, no one bothers it or helps it, as you do not know it's in pain, for you can't see someone crying in the rain)(rollercoasters are too cliche).

On psychoanalytical note, there was a gread deal of examples in Love puke of 'Games people play' reminded me of the transactional analysis of games people play by Eric Berne. Haven't used that to analyse my life for a long time...

Well on a reality check, i am so not progressing as i wanted. (maybe i should sing Majulah Kerfern everyday) I am struggling with the compilation of my notes, still at week 8, though we are starting week 10. And i HAVEN'T STARTED WITH MY ASSIGNMENT YET!!! Procrastination or no procrastination, i have to start today. Its friggin 6.3°C as i type this.

Look at this for the appaling state of the Aussie med education. Hope i turn out fine: http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,20867,19042005-2702,00.html

Watched 'Before Sunset' again, and again. It was nice, very.

It is Fear that creates cynics not Love.

"Let me sing you a waltz..."

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